Things have been a bit goofy for me in the last few weeks. The days leading up to my 50th birthday were kinda a stressful time. Yes, I have heard all of the jokes. Yes I know that this is a milestone time in everyones life and all of us start facing our own mortality. But despite all of this I refuse to take the over the hill attitude. I don’t fit into the “Not getting older, just better” catergory either. Because I seem to be getting worse….physically at least. My psychological forecast is good. I am trying to deal with a bunch and seem to be dealing ok.

My posts will probably seem erratic and sometimes strange in the coming weeks and I will explain that to y’all before you start wondering what happened to me. A little recent history will explain how I got to the place I am now. After the injury and resulting surgery in November 2000 things started being different in this drivers life. Now all of the uncertainity is back…with a vengance.

Last October I started falling down a lot. My legs seemed not to want to support me. The pain which had radiated into my left leg had begun to work its way into the left side. My feet began to feel like they were frostbitten. The slight breezes we get here in Roswell (sometimes 50 mph or more) challenged me going outside. The pain and imbalance caused me to seek the answers. Test after test, MRI after X-Ray, office visit after hospital visithave led the doctors to believe the scar tissue from that old operation was forming around the nerves in my lower spine. Not much they can do about that just yet.

They prescribed a nerve medicine and are working with the insurance company to do a treatment that is fairly new in the spine tech area. A treatment that is supposed to be very painful but will give me 3 to 5 months of relief between the horrors of the treatments. But my legs will support me again. My feet will quit hurting and the pain will return to just my right leg again. I hope.

The treatment sounds strange but has been widely recognized by spine proffesionals. It consists of 2 days in the hospital with a catheter in my spine where they can inject enzymes that eat scar tissue without affecting the nerves thamselves every 3 hours. The doc was straight with me when she told me the pain of the treatment was high. I hope she was right about the wonders of the results that come from a couple of days of more pain.

I have started taking pain meds again for a short while. Along with the weed I smoke they provide a bit of extra relief than my increasing marijuana intake was giving.  If the treatment works half as good as they say it will I will wean myself from the drugs once again and be back to just the pot.

So…I said all of that to say this. I hope I don’t seem too silly or disjointed over the next few weeks. If I do get a little strange you will know why. I really don’t like the pain meds and they are a drug I can just say no to most of the time. Just give me my weed and a little time and I am usually ok.

Aww hell. Now I’m just rambling.

Never mind.

Stumble it!